Pervert City Rants.
Dev things and the inability to have a functioning life while completing a game and meeting today's tiresome insistence of instant gratification is exhausting.
Disclaimer: I am known for hyperbole, so I might be just adding extra zest to some minor irritations… That said…
A little bit different here for this blog/review page this time. I feel it’s time for a rant, a long form statement talking about the pressures of being an AVN dev in this current climate and why it’s exhausting. Let me first state this: Yes, this is a dream of mine to make a game and have it be enjoyed. 180K+ views. 24k+ downloads. Nearly 2200 payments. I don’t regret a thing. I enjoy the extra money received from my work. It’s financially rewarding, however it comes with it flaws.
Knowing that an update is on the horizon means I am in work mode 24/7/31. I will be AFK at my desktop and still doing RL work. I shower and eat (often times, quick meals or take-out) and am back to work. Furthermore, I don’t talk to many people, I don’t do much, there isn’t enough TIME. Sometimes, I even cut back on sleep to make deadlines. Today, I stared at my code and my brain just couldn’t today. I did other things needed, but I could have been far more productive, and this slog has a month more to go…
Is my dream a waking nightmare? No, but I just want people to understand. Your game comes with a price, not just the money you gave me on Patreon, SubStar or Itch.io. There is a mental and physical toll being paid daily. Even on the other side of things, I could tell this was a thing. It’s partially why I began a dev chat, devs need someone who gets it and has been there. A place to vent on general frustrations as a whole.
But this time, I extend this sentiment out to all of you. Show love to your favorite dev, let them know your appreciation. Don’t let it be said too late until they are feeling broken and tired and wanting to be done with it forever.
I am now finishing this on another day. I got sleep, woke up refreshed but again my brain just said “NO. STOP!”. I feel a sense of shame and self-loathing. “Why wont you cooperate, brain. Do the thing you exist to do!” Today, I just went to do something I have been putting off and did something random and went and got a tasty coffee to break monotony and try to crush this fog. Nope. So here I try to write this and even now, my body fights it and doesn’t want to do it.
I guess this is just babbling at this point. That said, have a nice day.
